Growing up with two gay men is like having the best of both worlds. While I did not have a mother in the house, there was no shortage of maternal instinct cruising through the walls. Neither of my dad’s were Nellie (that’s gay talk for overtly feminine); in fact, if you did not know and they were not drinking you would think they were quite butch (more gay talk for being very masculine straight…unless referring to a lesbian and then that would mean she looks like a man). I felt like a Princess during all holidays but withouth all the makeup and eating disorders. I had more uncles than you could imagine and they always came with gifts. To this day, I have never bought myself a piece of jewelry. Why? Because, my dad’s and uncles taught me that buying jewelry was a man’s job. Fuck all this women empowerment shit on buying rings for yourself because you want them. Being empowered is refraining from rolling on your back with your feet up in the air trying to impress someone pounding the shit out of you by moaning that he is making you feel so good. Ummm, No. You are empowered when you stop thinking that you can control the world with your vagina and realize that your power is within that patch of hair further north. I was taught that you never go on a date that you cannot pay for the whole dinner yourself and that you do not buy jewelry for yourself. Think it’s any oxymoron? Lemme break it down for ya.
You have to set parameters for yourself. The biggest parameter/boundary is that you can always take care of yourself financially. You do not rely on anyone to take care of you or your business. BUT….men do need to feel like there is a reason for being in your life aside from giving you another little mouth to feed. A dildo can get you off and your girlfriends can keep you company. Doesn’t leave a lot of room for man, does it? Well, if you also go out and buy yourself expensive jewelry what is it that he can give you? Your dad sets the bar for the quality of jewelry and then your man takes over. I am not saying that men need to feel that they are in your life to buy you rings and bobbles. What I am saying is that you have to leave room somewhere. You have got to leave something for men to do for you. If you go out and buy yourself that diamond and sapphire ring you’ve had your eye on, your man is going to think “Well, if she can buy herself everything, what I am here for?” Men need purpose. And, if they are not bringing home the bacon and giving you the sausage they will need something aside from doing the dishes (p.s. they should always being givin up that sausage). Your man should be the person you rely on to swoop you off your feet with a big ass diamond. Not your girlfriend, not your gay friends and definitely not you.
The moral of the story is this: you know you can take care of yourself. There is no need to flaunt that because if you know it, then what the fuck do you care who else knows? Leave something for the man in your life to give to you that he knows you are not going to go out and buy for yourself. It will keep the romance in your relationship and keep you feeling special when you see that Tifffany Blue Bow 😉